I hate McDonalds. Ronald McDonalds is a perfect mascot for clowns like me that keep coming back there. I've had my fair share of experiences throughout the years with McDonalds, so I'd like to share my personal, biased, and possibly controversial review of their popular menu items in Canada. The rating scale will be from S to F tier.
A Tier: Tangy. Nauseating. The McDonalds Poster Boy. Call it what it is: hot garbage. You don't feel good after the experience but you'll keep coming back to it, like doomscrolling on social media.
B Tier: Basically a double cheeseburger with an unholy amount of chunky onions but for double the price. Sometimes you crave that tho.
S Tier: The bulking season classic, but I've been bulking for 20+ years. It's amazing because it doesn't break the bank but is equally as effective at breaking your gut as the other items.
E Tier: I can't explain why there's such a large gap between these and the Double Cheeseburger / McDouble but it's there. Just save your money and eat cardboard.
D Tier: You'll be lamenting your decision to get nuggets when you have to share them. It may or may not divert your attention from the fact that they're drier than a Popeyes biscuit. That's why they come with dip.
F Tier: Perfect for people that suffer from pica.
Pica (Disorder)
The term pica describes craving and chewing substances that have no nutritional value or are not usually considered food â such as ice, clay, soil or paper. Craving and chewing ice, known as pagophagia, is often associated with iron deficiency, with or without anemia, although the reason is unclear.
A Tier: Nothing junior about this sandwich, it's sapid and juicy. I had to google that word because it's bussin.
A Tier: The bulking season combo, which goes hand in hand with a double cheeseburger. It gaslights you into thinking that you're eating healthy.
S Tier: The Filet-O-Fish lore is just as appetizing as the sandwich. The hula burger didn't die for no reason. Having this once will keep you in a lifelong chokehold with Stockholm syndrome.
C Tier: Mid. The ham, sausage, and bacon options remind you of a 9 to 5 job, as it's all the same thing and comes from the same pig at the end of the day. The chicken option is blasphemous, ignore that.
C Tier: The same tier as a McMuffin but for a different reason. It's gambling with your body in risking heartburn for that maple syrup sugary kick. You'll be singing the national anthem both figuratively and literally withâĐglowingâĐheartsâĐweâĐseeâĐtheeâĐrise, TheâĐTrueâĐNorthâĐstrongâĐandâĐfree!.
D Tier: Comes with salsa but should come with toilet paper. A Taco Bell inspired special.
C Tier: It's an A Tier if out of the frier within 10 minutes. After that, it goes straight down to E Tier and tastes like cold oil with salt. Kinda like watching a Maple Leafs game.
B Tier: Ordering the poutine will automatically add an extra 5-10 minutes to your wait time, but it's still a better choice than fries with a 10 minute expiration date.
N / A: Never had one, the machine is always broken. Would you rather have $1 Million Dollars or $100,000 Dollars for every successful order of the McFlurry of 25 orders?
Grimace: Happy Birthday Grima- â°ïļðŠĶð